Wednesday, November 5, 2008

I'll be damned if this isn't incredible.


I teared up when I read this story, because that is just amazing and beautiful; but the thing that really made me lose my shit and shed some water was comment no. 17 made in response to the ignorant and thoughtless comment no. 16. Some people just do not get it, but I am truly moved when there are people who do.

Friday, October 17, 2008


Drape Autumn's blanket
Thank if for displacing me from time's thralldom
Shed my beliefs like falling leaves
You can't reason with the seasons
Easin' pain is not a game of haggle
So reach to those who straggle, and drag 'em in 'til the bag is full

Mull, nag and survey the scene
The green is never clean, just kempt
And conquerin' every acre won't exempt you from death
Preemption is impermanent, gentle to circumvent
Is not preserving wealth impertinent to observing every breath?
Health is a commodity to affluence's progeny
Whose medicine fetish reflects misdirection of ontogeny
"¡Comemos fármacos in gross doses!"
But Lucky Charms junkies won't foreclose on the crypt of the final repose
Nor will they give up the farm to buy the ghost

So raise a toast to cognitive embodiment's host!
And to the party bid adieu, the lease on your particles is due
Please don't be boorish, duck bills and beaks of geese need nourishment
Proceed on route to seed the roots to breed the weeds to flourish to feed to endure...
Who thought I would say, "Life rules?"
It's a flux of sorrows flecked by smiles borrowed
And tryin' not to wreck a worthwhile tomorrow
And you'll go out of style when it's your turn, recede your leaves
As you're balding in the Fall, give me a call
Leafraker, I'll make it brief

Drape Autumn's blanket
Thank it for displacing me from time's thralldom
Shake off my grief like fallen leaves
Many a tear spent won't resurrect
Rain rots burial plots fain forgotten
That all the bereaved may be relieved

Detritus comprised us the moment Mom devised of us
The demise of us?: accruement of dissolution of the glue that binds the dust!
We're dramatized organ-husks!
I don't mean to be brusque, but what's the fuss?
Can our pieces depart conceit and caprice?
Can lofty discourse do naught but gnash the breeze?
Conceive!: aspiring ever-greens expired as ashes
Retire the joke when petrified oak's ire broke the branches
Yggdrasil crashes!
Empires will burn!
Entire species will concede defeat!
Fragmented Firmament ceramic shattered at Babylon's feet!
Thermo-dynamics demands universal depletion of heat!

So clap your hands before they ban the ampersand!
And you'll be damned if you don't understand when the party gets out of hand!
Can't put a finger upon the ring, blunderer?
Can't appeal to the thunderous peal?
Wonder deals not in relief
Obtuse is the vein of the motif underlain
We're loose change to derail the train, water to stop the drain
Playin' like death is abuse and estrangement
An extrinsic affliction to be assuaged
But this is no foreign exchange, nor phage, nor passing engagement
It's your boring, logical extent, your orderly disarrangement

It isn't a transitory state, there's no addendum to your story
There's no severance nor glorious reward
Nor beckoning light toward which to drift
Your shift is fin, take a break
You don't have to fake that grin
Go ahead and flake out, you won't awake
The rake is your escape

Drape Autumn's blanket
Thank if for displacing me from time
Leafraker, what's on your mind?

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Grand theft auto... for?

I played this game:

I ran at full blast into a business-man and shoved him aside, causing him to lose his balance and tumble to the concrete. Quickly I turned around, approached his prostrate form... and I stood on him.

With separate leg articulation!

He attempted to right himself, and he had hardly achieved a crouching posture when I took a little step and sort of pushed him over again. I then proceeded to stand upon this man for at least ten minutes, all the while delighting in his wretched struggle for ascension.

I can confidently say that I have unlocked the true potential of this game: virtual assholism.

Monday, April 28, 2008

True story.

Well, I have not done a journal entry basically ever.

So the other morning (this was extreme morning, super-ante-meridian) I went over to Taylor Haus and parked my car across the street. I guess I parked in front of some trucks that were sitting on somebody's lawn, which isn't the coolest shit, but I didn't think they would be leaving any time before I did.

It is important to understand that the front, driver-side door of my car is one squawkin'-ass mofo, and occasionally its howl will summon a truly fell beast. So I got out of my car, and immediately I heard some guy talking to me. I turned around to see a fat man wearing a moustache and an a-shirt, possibly pants, I don't remember. He said something resembling, "I hope you don't plan on parking there for very long."

"No, I will probably be gone in a couple of hours," I replied.

"'Cause I've got two vehicles right there." No shit?

"Well if you're going to be leaving soon I could move my car."

"'Cause there's a fire hydrant right there, and that's illegal." Oh. Admittedly I did not notice the fire hydrant.

"Oh, thanks. I'll move my car. Thanks." He didn't even say anything else before he re-entered his home. "Thanks," I said again, "you tit." He didn't come back, but I probably would have fought that man. I was in a weird mood.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

The stagnatest generation.

You open up your mouth and say,
"There's nothin' to do in this town!"

And I say, "Pipe down, indolent spawn of the internet!"
Don't be wettin' in my bed
You're incensed, you're so dense
You expect me to be interested
In your relentlessly adolescent torrent of inner torment
That was intended as a statement!
And it ain't a question: you've made fessin' a profession!
To supplement your other methods of employment:
Malcontentment; complainin'; incontinent frustration!
Your schematic is titanically ironic
You're flagrantly impatient to the point of histrionic
Yet you're gravely stationary, been waitin' to be entertained since birth
Now you're the hardest-shirkin' slave to instant gratification on the face of the earth!
Wither the worth of the witless
Please cease to belabor this explicitly scripted behavior
I don't care to savior, maybe you can save yourself
But probably you'll just be overwhelmed and wander off
To gawk at some other unencumbering, numb, dumb shit, dim-wit

You lazy punks!
Self-entitled lumps!
Your ship is sunk because I debunked your triflin' slump
And you kicked the brain-bucket
Have you ever sought fulfillment?
Do you endeavor to be full of excrement?
I didn't wanna put you down, but you started thinkin' aloud,
"There's nothin' to do in this town!"

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Gneiss guy.

One morning my mind was reborn
Torn from the lithostatic of the past into the stagnance of the present
Erratic ambition agitated my indecision to progress
And profess that only myself I have to impress
The will to change possess I alone
Exchange my lazy seat of stone
For an incommodious throne
Excising my ass from lethargizing imprecisely
Presently, deftly I will, perhaps ungently, feistily revise
This pomegranate into pome-gneiss!

Oh yes, I am a gneiss guy
Mundanely mistaken as a granite man
Disguised as a wise guy
But wisdom comes from some exotic plumb
Hitherto untasted by this wastrel

Repurpose this pile of debased brain cells!

Unsteady, heavy-heady
Already you're regretting getting embedded in this nonsense
Suspense of defense, shields down
Pay attention to this lesson lest you get schooled in the first round
Profoundly pronoun: it's time to lay the laziness aside
Before you find you're on the wrong side of an insurmountable divide
Generically gerund: usin' the same, old ing on everything
You've invented a non-descript epidemic, I suspect!
Abjectly adjective: what do you expect when you reject introspection?
Neglect your intellect and expect to get disrespected
Absurdly adverbal: you're not a turned-over turtle set in granite, man!
You're a gneiss guy!
But you've reduced your muse to an obtuse recluse
Due to a double-dose-colon disuse-semicolon excuses, excuses
Don't eschew it, stupid!
This is a geologic process of self-improvement through ego rebootin'
So get used to the effusive

Confusing creatures, mistakes!
The difference between what eats you and what you intake
To slake your thirst for personal reimbursement
To your atrophic, mind-power muscle
For all the apathetic, idle hours rustled for nothin'
But with this knowledge don't prepare an apology
Spare the ignominy!
Bein' indefinitely sorry is hardly conducive to lucidity
There is no insufficiency, only a proclivity to passivity
But what could this missive be?
It reads, "Don't be remiss to reminisce on this
"And don't dismiss all the shit you really wish not to relive"
Reiterate: inside the gneissest guy you will find remnants of granite
Confined reminders of a time when you were immeasurably desperate
Plentiful reflection recompenses immensive benefit

You'll never fully abandon what you enacted
Bombastic memories abstracted and moments monastic
The gneiss guy finishes porphyroclastic

And that

Is fantastic